In Hiding No Longer

It feels really good not to be hiding a core of who I am any longer. I know it may cause problems in the future, and I know that it isn't completely understood by those I love. But I really cannot tell you how good it feels to have everyone know.

Things I would like to do in the (near) furture

In no particular order....they just kind of fell out of my brain this way -

* Get a Job outside of the home

* Finish all my crochet projects (yes, even the couple blankets I've got in the works)

* Watch all of the current (from 2005 on) Doctor Who episodes

* Get the whole apartment organized (especially the baby room, it's like a toddler lives her or something)

* Dye my hair an awesome new shade (that will still be okay if I work outside the home)

* Finally get my in-laws to respond to my texts (I'll be honest, it's starting to irritate me)

* Work on my anger issues (and general emotional well being)

* Be more regular on getting my lists done each day

* Read more

* Read to Loki at least twice a day

* Play more games with Loki

* Have a little more quality 'me' time

* Spend more quality time with my friends

* Have a Wii (and instant Netflix)

Fate

I have a problem with the idea of faith and pre-destination. It just feels like too much of a box, that our every move has been plotted out and planed since we were in the womb.

The ultimate question to counter the 'fate' problem in my mind is; "why would God give us free will if He were to pre-destine our lives?"

But that just bring up a scary counter point; what if He did set this all up, and 'free will' is just the window we get to look out of to believe that our every move isn't plotted out and planned from the moment of our conception (which, by the way, had been planned as well, just not by our parents)

My brain comes up with weird things when I should be asleep.

Life keeps moving on

and at times I feel as if I am glued to the spot, unable to keep up.

Loki is still coughing up a storm lately, and I still find myself out of breath and coughing at the most inappropriate times. But we are both starting to heal and get better. Other than that no important news to report from our end, just feels like I'm waiting for something big to happen and make everything work out just right again.