A rose's true form

Delicate situations bite ass
All i want to do is yell about the injustice
Get others on my side
Telling me i'm right
Not a bitch, just opinionated
That he lied

Cause he was mad
And i refuse to cry

But i must be quiet and demure
For he is always one step ahead and sure

A rose, his true form
Beautiful, sweet to the senses
But when touched wounded you will be
For no matter the skin, his words are sharper still

excuses...excuses

I didn't write down my list yesterday because it was Husband's birthday, and trust me, I did a lot of cleaning, and got my whole list done. Which made Husband very pleased with me, he said I was a very good girl, and he was proud of me, which made me grin like an idiot.

3/14

hand wash dishes
call/view apartments
fill dishwasher
gather all dirty clothes
fold one basket of clothes
get some crocheting done


I really need to get some crafting done, and work on getting my etsy site up and running again. Hopefully this time I'll get some things sold and be able to make some money on the side for us.

The New Beginning

3/12/12

empty dishes
tidy up table
shower
gather all dirty dishes
fold one basket of clean clothes
call tb about lanes
bed time routine

Now you may ask yourself why I would need to put something so simple as shower on my list. Well, wait till you have a child, and then you probably won't need to ask anymore.

New Ideas

Well, due to parts of my life changing, my blog is going to change as well. (especially since I can update this from my phone also, so hopefully that will help with these changes)

Husband assigns me a list (that I get to help assign my tasks) that I get done while he's at work and I take care of Munchkin. It's helping center me while dealing with the new stress and completely new routine taking care of Munchkin. I am a horrible creature of habit, and with the new baby it's completely disrupted that. So my lists are helping center me for the day, and also reminding me that I am serving my Husband.

What my goal is going to be is to put my list up every morning, well, morning as in when Munchkin decides it's time to get up. And cross things off as I go, along with little things of what has happened. I think it will be a nice way to me to get more used to writing again, and also working on getting more little routines going so I feel a lot more normal and settled. Cause evidently when I don't feel normal and settled I'm kind of a bitch, and I really don't like that, so it needs to change.

And it will!

To my cousin M

It's been almost two years since you were killed. I know I don't post on your Facebook wall or your memory page, and sometimes I feel like I'm not grieving right because of that. But if I remember right you weren't really on Facebook all that much anyways.
I also feel guilty because I don't think of you everyday. But I didn't think of you everyday when you were alive either. I do miss you M, in my own way. When I watch Fantasia with Munchkin I remember watching with you A and Ber, talking about our favorite musical parts. I don't remember yours, but I know A and Ber both loved the fish from the Nutcracker Suite.
I also remember playing at Grandma and Grandpa's, exploring the old barn, playing in the greenhouse, and Uncle's attic. A being the wise woman sending us all on quests. Going down to the barn for chores, playing with the kittens and newborn calves.
Sadly most of my memories are of our childhood. I do wish we could have gotten to know each other more as adults, but it's the human fault to think we have more time.
I do miss you M, in my own quiet way.

Good news everyone!

Husband has a job! Well, two actually. He's working as a part-time salesman, and a part-time driver for an auto store. I'm so very proud of him! And some of the best news is that if everything goes well I'll get to stay at home with Munchkin!

The first Christmas

We had our first Christmas celebration today. Went to MawMa's and got to see both her daughters and all of their kids, it was great to hear MawMa literally squeal in glee to see her oldest granddaughter and great-granddaughter. Munchkin was the life of the party, even though she slept through most of it. Everyone was so happy to see her, I think I only ever held her when she was hungry and needed fed...
I'm looking forward to saturday and going to the Christmas Eve service at the church I grew up at. It's my favorite Christmas tradition. And then Christmas day we're going over to Ber's house to open presents. It'll be so much fun.
Husband hasn't heard anything from his siblings, and nothing from his mother either, so I don't believe that we will be seeing them. And it's very sad to me, I understand his feeling towards his mother at this point (to tell the truth I'm more than a little upset and very disappointed at her responses as well) but I am not going to oppose his decisions concerning her. However, I know he wanted to see his siblings, and from one sister we haven't even heard back from, and the other we never got any solid plans for a sibling meet up and exchanging of gifts.
I suppose if nothing else we'll just surprise visit the siblings that live in Kansas and drop off their gifts, but I know Husband really wanted to have some sit down time and show off Munchkin to his brothers that haven't gotten to see her yet, who knows what will happen.
As for me, I'm just keeping my fingers crossed and being hopeful.