Little Post About Nothing

Just some things on my mind lately:

• Kind of looking forward to going back to work
• Really wanting to read a lot lately
• I've been to the library twice this week, mostly because I picked up the third book in the series instead of the first book due to being mislead by the inside cover.
• I've been wanting to knit or crochet more lately, but not able to find the time (or lap space) to do so.
• I miss playing WoW, but don't want to have to pay for it, so I've been looking for a new game to play, I think I've found one in Runescape, but I'm not sure yet. (Mostly because i have only about 10 minutes a day I can actually get on the computer and play) 
• People still don't understand that the quickest way to anger me is to insult my husband or marriage
• I have a problem holding grudges, but in order to work on that flaw I would need to have forgiven the person, and to be honest they have hurt someone I love too much for me to be able to forgive them yet.
• I've been wanting to update my blog more often, because I enjoy writing and feel the want to do so more often, so my current goal is to post every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. We'll see how that goes. 
• My swing motor picked the worst possible time to stop swinging. The music still plays, it just no longer swings without man power. 
• I'm going to dye my hair on Sunday 
• Hopefully in the next few nights I have time to try out the foam curlers Ber gave me. 
• I smell spit up no matter where I am, even right after a shower. 

Book Review Time!

The Policy
Bentley Little

January 2003
Borrowed from Library







This is only the second B. Little book I've read, the first was awesome, I'd never read anything like it, but this one seemed to follow the same pattern as the first book I read, that caused me to quickly loose interest.

(Please keep in mind I started reading this before I gave birth, so some of the details are fuzzy, but i do believe I remember the important parts, if I'm wrong you can always leave a comment and let me know what you think)


In this book, we follow a man who is on his way to being an ex-husband, looking for a new start and a want to return to his roots. So he moves back to his home city and looks for a new place and finds one that seems perfect, so he immediately signs the lease and plans to move his belongings across the states. A moving truck is rented and his car is left at the new house.
When he returns two days later he finds a crack in his back window and promptly calls the insurance company. The call is odd, the representative asking odd questions and being rude and profane.
From there it slowly declines as the house he's renting is broken into and when the insurance company is called the same rude representative answers with his completely inappropriate questions. This service causes our main man to change insurance companies to one that seems perfect, they have coverage for everything.
The only problem is, if you don't take insurance that is offered to you, you'll soon wish you had.

It sounds like such a great story line, and I'm sure it would be, but I just could not get into it! It seemed to follow the same progression that the book previous I read did (which I loved!)
I'm hoping that waiting a few weeks and reading some different genres will allow me to enjoy the next book of his I try to read.

Since things are relatively slower right now (especially since I finally got Odin down for a nap, that child goes through phases where he can't bear to be separated from me and refuses to even hang out in his bouncer.) I'm going to try to keep updating my blog fairly often, mostly because I miss writing a lot. Also because I'm going to be working on the computer a fair amount looking into freezer meals and preparation and lots of crock pot cooking and going over things with Husband in order to make cooking easier on him when I go back to work, and also making it easier on me as well. 

I've already started back up on my lists again, with Husband checking to make sure I'm getting my chores done. Plus this time around Husband has his own little 'honey do' list of things to start transitioning his thinking to house husband. So far he's doing wonderfully, I couldn't be prouder of him. I think he's going to do wonderful being a stay-at-home-dad. 

We had our first whole family grocery trip yesterday, didn't go to bad, Loki was fairly well behaved even if she insists on 'helping' to push the cart. I carried Odin around in my K'Tan wrap that Mom gave me at Loki's baby shower. I loved it with Loki, and I'm loving it still with Odin, I would definitely recommend it, or any form or wrap to moms. It was a fairly short trip, just getting some essentials we can't live without, we'll see how the long shopping trip goes later this week. 

But anywho, I'm off (while Odin's still asleep and Loki's behaving) to plot plan for some freezer meals next week. 

I'd forgotten

Just how stressful it is having a new born, although I'm supposing you forget that on purpose, otherwise you probably would never have a second child (kind of like forgetting the pain of childbirth as soon as you hold your child for the first time)
That being said, it's been a little bit of an adjustment having both kids, and I'm sure it will continue to be so. Loki's doing pretty good most days, every once in a while she's horribly whiny and completely uncooperative, but for the most part she's adjusting okay to everything. We've been trying very hard to give her lots of one-on-one time with each of us. (Husband has been doing so wonderfully with that, Loki has really been enjoying her daddy time)
But Husband is working while I'm on leave from work, so that's making some of my evenings a little stressful, especially when Odin wants nothing other that to be held or nursed. It's a little hard to cook dinner for Loki and myself with a crying infant. But thankfully Loki's not horribly picky and enjoys sandwiches so if Odin is being particularly fussy I can just whip up a quick peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

In other news, Odin had his second doctor's appointment today, to see how he's doing and make sure he's gained back the his birth weight, and he has! He's actually 2 oz over his birth weight, so now he weighs as much as Loki did when she was born. Breastfeeding is going very well for us this time around, not latching problems like we had the first time.
This week will begin adventures in pumping and storing breast milk in preparation for me going back to work in just over a month. That will really be an adventure.

It actually happened!

For those of you who don't know yet, I did successfully give birth to a beautiful baby boy, my little Odin entered the world on February 7, 2014 at 12:18 pm 7 lbs 7 oz and 19.75 in long.

Birth Story Below:

May contain gory details you don't want to know

You have been warned. 

It was a surprising process to me. I was induced this time, went into the hospital the night before and was given a drug to soften my cervix which is also known to start contractions and in a lucky few actually get everything rolling before they give you the pitocin. Well it did end up giving me contractions, all night long. But luckily I was able to sleep through most of it. Sleep might have been too strong of a word though, but at least I was able to attempt to get some rest. 

About 9 they started the pitocin drip. Everything was going rather smoothly, I wasn't dilating very quickly, but the contractions were progressing well and around 11 were at the 1-3 minute apart mark. Around that time I finally made it to a 4, which meant I would be able to get the epidural (I was so happy about that, I really didn't want to go through everything naturally again, I'd done it once, that was enough in my mind) 

I'm guessing around 11:15 or 11:30 is when i started feeling nauseous, and then started throwing up. (yeah, did not like that happening again this time around. I could have done without that a second time, but they always say throwing up gives you the best contractions) They called down to let them know I wanted the shot and I got up because the last few contractions had made me feel like I'd wet myself (actually turned out to be my water breaking, but we didn't put that together until later) I waddled to the bathroom with Husband helping with that darn IV pole

Contractions got much worse rather quickly at that point, and by the time I sat back down I was having trouble staying still during the pain. The nurse was so nice, she kept telling me that if I just stay still they'll be right in, the anesthesia guy is right outside the door waiting on me. (I realize this was a lie now, but good lord did I need them to lie to me, it hurt) 

I'm sitting with my feet dangling on the edge of the bed in position to get a needle stuck in my back trying desperately to stay still. The nurse decides to check me since I'm in so much pain. I'm now at an 8 (I went from a 4 to an 8 in less than half an hour, not exactly in the plan) It is in that moment, leaning back against Husband while sitting on the side of the bed my body decides it's now time to push. 

The nurse looks a little startled when I tell her this, and as my body contracts I cry "Not again! I wanted to get the epidural this time!" The nurse is dialing her phone trying to get a doctor into the room, and I'm still sitting leaning back on Husband, and being told to lay down. Husband swears he heard her say "I don't want to have to catch this baby" 

The doctor makes it in and Husband lays me down on the bed. My body is on auto pilot for the birth, and I couldn't stop pushing if my life depended on it. From the point of me laying on my back it took less than 5 minutes before Odin was in the Doctor's arms crying. 

Husband's comment was "your body really knows how to give birth" I just grumbled about how I didn't get an epidural. 

To be completely honest, when giving birth it feels like your neither regions are slowly being set on fire as the head and shoulders comes out. I still remember that pain from giving birth to Loki, I felt that for less than a minute with Odin, he just came into the world too abruptly to cause me much pain. I was still in shock about two hours later that I had actually already given birth and actually was holding my son in my arms. 

7 days till eviction

How far along: 38 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: loss of 20 lbs

Sleep: restless

Best moment this week: The fear/relief knowing that for sure Odin will be here next week.

Movement: Some, I think he's pretty much run out of space.

Food Cravings: Ice water, lots of ice water, and I really want some candy hearts since those are all over the place, but I can't have any :-(

Food Aversions: I have no idea, it just depends on the day and time.

Gender: boy

Labor Signs: Yes, Sunday I had to go to the hospital due to contractions every 5-7 minutes apart for 2 hours. Started dilating, but after an hour in the hospital if slowed down.

Belly Button in or out: still an innie

What I miss: being comfortable

What I'm looking forward to: Not having to worry about blood sugar stuffs.

Weekly Wisdom: Breathe and make lists, they will help you feel more prepared.

Milestones: Odin is over 6 lbs 8 oz right now (that's how he was measuring at last week's sonogram, and is about the size of a leek

It feels more like he's the size of these leeks though:

All in all Odin's organs are mature and ready for the real world. Now we just need to wait till next week at 8pm! 

Miscarriages

No, before anyone freaks out, I have not had one, Odin is still doing just fine.

The one I want to talk about happened in 2009, a way long time ago it feels like, but sometimes it feels like yesterday.
It was my first pregnancy, I had found out and told everyone, Husband and I were so happy, I was working as a CMA and enjoying my job, everything looked like it was going our way. Then I started spotting, the doctor did a sonogram, and it looked like the placenta hadn't attached all the way. They never came out and said I would loose the baby, and even if they had I don't think I would have heard it, I was too excited to be pregnant.
A week or so later it started getting worse, I was getting cramps and pain, enough to where they sent me home from work. The next day I called in to work and talked to my doctor. They confirmed what was happening. I was in shock. The next two days flew by in a haze. Until I got a call from work, telling me I was fired due to absences. I had been sent home one day and called in sick the next, but evidently they didn't care that I had a doctor's note. It was horrible. It seemed like my whole life just stopped at that moment, I'd never been fired before.

Now you may be asking why I'm bringing this up now, when I'm set to deliver in just over 2 weeks.

The pain of the loss never leaves you, no matter how far along you are when you loose your little one. I've been hearing recently from people talking about pregnant women not being appreciative of what's happening to them, about how they should be grateful they can even carry a child.
I have read articles saying that it's as common for 1 in 4 women to have had a miscarriage. But I haven't been able to find a solid medical source for that statistic. However, I can only name one woman I know of that has kids that did not have at least one miscarriage somewhere in her life.
So if you hear me complaining about how uncomfortable I am, or how much I wish it was over, be careful about making the snap judgement that I'm ungrateful for being able to carry a child.
For the first months before I could feel Odin moving I was terrified, I still am terrified if he's still for too long. You can ask Husband, I worried and fretted all the time. (He'd probably laugh if he ever heard anyone say I'm not worrying about something) I would even say this goes for most women, miscarriage is not talked about very often, it seems like most people treat it like a dirty secret to have lost a child, like that somehow meant they weren't good enough.

Now I've kind of lost my focus, sorry, it happens often. I guess all I'm saying is be kind to one another, we've almost all suffered a loss before, we know how it hurts, especially when everyone seems to get pregnant as soon as your precious one is gone. (that one hurts the most, seeing other people so happy while you are suffering and in pain)